Razing Arizona


First of all, Im neither Republican or Democrat. But it amazes me that you say the GOP got everything they wanted as far as the immigration law. You say Arizona is going to get whiter??? You're an idiot. If you and others fully understood that our country has a damn problem from immigrants coming here illegally. It dont matter what country they come from, they're a drain on our economy and finances. They also bring diseases to our people! We can't afford to take care of them and their taking of jobs that Americans could have!!! I wish all states followed Arizona's lead and told the Feds to fuck off!!! - actual email sent to my inbox on OpEd.

It's like a penis parade with electric vuvuzelas amplified by 100 watt Marshall amps. And, once again, JP has brought them out of the woodwork without even trying.

My last article, crossposted on Op-Ed News, the hard-hitting liberal, progressive news and opinion site that's become my summer home this month, has been promoted to headline status. If you go to their index page, you'll note that "The (Republican) Terrorists Have Already Won" is the story that's second from the top, well above the "fold."

The reason for this is the number of hits it must have gotten (although I have no way of tracking that) plus the comments it's generated (47 57 to date). As well as pieces by citizen journalists and bloggers like me, it features original pieces and crossposts by luminaries such as OpEd founder Rob Kall, Danny Schechter and Robert Parry. You'll note that articles far better than mine go, half the time, without generating a single comment. The other half of OpEd's articles get single digit comments.

My 391 word article, which started off as a rambling series of off-the-cuff comments said to Mrs. JP at a coffee shop, eventually crystallized into a brief blog post that I decided to cross-post on Rob Kall's site. It was grabbed more rapidly than anything else they ever accepted (within a half hour) and got linked on Buzzflash almost as quickly. The comments started pouring in immediately, especially when Rob Kall decided to immediately front-page it.

It got to the point where I was spending all my preciously limited internet time reading and responding to the comments. This morning, I found dozens more. I still haven't read them all. But I will make some observations:

If one is adventurous enough to regard this response as a bellwether of what issues will be hot during the midterms, then one will conclude that immigration suddenly just got very, very sexy. But what else can account for this massive (and surprisingly negative and critical) response to my post on SB 1070? Am I the first person to have written about immigration or SB 1070 on OpEd News? Uh, hardly.

Then again, it may have something to do with the provocative title, "The (Republican) Terrorists Have Already Won." Ah, there's the rub and the rub goes the wrong way. Now I know how Janet Napolitano felt when Homeland Security released their report on the rise of right wing terrorism and she was assailed by every Republican bed sheet-wearer in the land.

Now, my comments are being flagged for being partisan (on a liberal, progressive site) and abusive. I've been called a racist (someone with two biracial sons) and I even have a concern troll who presumes to tell me, me of all people, how to write and respond to others. Rob Kall responded by not only front-paging my crappy little article but elevated it to the top of the index page. It's bringing traffic to his site. I've done my job.

But it's not only notable that it took a post about immigration to elicit such a response but one that, justifiably, charges the Republican Party and its apologists with racism. It's brought out all the crazies that troll OpEd News more regularly than I suspect even Rob Kall knew.

And all because I spoke the truth. Not an opinion, but the God's unflyblown, ineluctable, incontrovertible truth: SB 1070 is rooted in racism, something every Latino schoolchild can see with one eye closed. If it wasn't about racism and fear of people darker than us, then how come the immigration debate is completely about the southern border and not the northern border near Canada, through which far more national security threats have been intercepted than Mexico?

The response that my post has gotten, with some people actually sympathetic to the Iowa Republican Party's laughable attempt to strip President Obama of his citizenship just for accepting the Nobel Peace Prize, is a microcosm of what Glenn Beck said about Obama being a racist who doesn't like white people.

Well, neither do I. My people have been a locust swarm, a pox, pestilence and plague on the planet earth. I loathe stupid white men with a burning hatred and resentment for turning our world into the fetid cellpool of oily, polluted opportunism that it's become. I am living in, literally, a different nation than the one in which I grew up in the late 70's/early 80's. Manifest Destiny, obviously, isn't aimed at just dark-skinned people, anymore.

And the racist scumbags who wrote, ratified and signed SB 1070 into law, are also largely stupid white men who pontificate about Mexicans taking jobs that white people don't want to do. But taking harvesting jobs away from respectable white folks like us isn't what SB 1070 is about. It's not about driving away the illegal immigrants who nonetheless pour billions each year into the Arizona state economy and still pay taxes without getting what they're paying for.

It's about driving out the legal ones who vote Democratic, as Greg Palast reminded us last April. And, as I stated yesterday, SB 1070 had worked beyond their wildest dreams: Tens of thousands of Mexicans, even ones here legally, have been forced to leave a land that had once belonged to their ancestors until we stole it from them in the early 19th century. And they're taking their votes with them.

SB 1070, among other things, requires everybody (meaning those with dark skin) to carry papers on them proving citizenship. Even if one is a legal immigrant, not having those papers on them is in itself a crime.

How is this in any way, shape and form not reminiscent of the Jewish ghettos of Nazi eastern Europe? How comes we're not so concerned about Swedish immigrants in Minnesota or the Dakotas or the Polish immigrants of Michigan? Or Italian immigrants in the North End of Boston or Rhode Island?

It's aimed at Hispanics and, audaciously, Native Americans who were here before everyone else. And we're supposed to believe this is a debate about economics? If that was true, they would've thought twice about passing a law that was guaranteed to crater a state economy by depriving it of much of the $29 billion poured into it by Latinos and other immigrants (about 8% of its economy).

If it was about what was legally viable or not, they wouldn't have passed a racist law that requires dark-skinned people to carry citizenship papers with them 24/7 (do you?), one guaranteed to be challenged and struck down in federal courts. If they wanted to remain true to the spirit of the law, they could've continued with 287g, that allows the federal government to deputize state and city law enforcement agencies to round up illegal immigrants.

Oh wait. That was taken away from Sheriff Joe Arpaio, the racist scumbag whose tent city in Maricopa County had become a national disgrace, a place in which the almost exclusively Mexican Americans die and suffer from lack of medical care.

Yet to hear the scumbags who are commenting on my article, whatever horrors we can visit on these people or allow to happen to them they brought on themselves. Because they broke the law.

Well, so did Bush, Cheney, Rumsfeld, Karl Rove, Alberto Gonzales and thousands of other crooks, liars and war criminals and you don't see those douchebags getting deported to the Netherlands to stand war crimes trials. No, they're richer than ever and are getting signed to one book and TV deal after another.

So spare me your fucking pieties about what's legal and who deserves what.

Happy Times

My beautiful dad.




The beach houses surrounding the house we stayed in. The agapanthus grows wild in front of these houses. I would love to see them flowering.



The gardens in this small sleepy beach side town are to-die-for.



Table set for Dad's Birthday lunch.






I spotted this cute beach shack when I was out picking flowers and loved it. In New Zealand I've noticed they paint many of their houses black and white which I love.



I had a bath in this huge clawfoot bath every day we were there. I love the little vintage butterfly prints on the wall.




When we eventually renovate the kitchen in our new house I definitely want to have a cabinet built just like this one which was in the kitchen at the beach house. It was so perfect for all the plates, platters, cups etc.



The beach in front of the house.

We've just returned home from a week in New Zealand where we celebrated my father's 60th Birthday. After spending a few days in Auckland we caught a plane down to Napier and drove down to a beautiful beach house my parent's have been frequenting over the past 12 months in a sleepy beach side town in Hawkes Bay. We spent 3 days here with my parents, brothers, cousins, aunty & uncle and our grandmother. It was the most wonderful holiday with lots of laughs, lots of tears and lots of reminiscing. Mum cooked an amazing lunch for Dad on his birthday. I went down the street and picked some gorgeous roadside flowers which I arranged for the table. It was the most amazing week away from work and the craziness of life. Happy 60th Birthday Dad. You are one in a million and we all love you so much.


If anyone is interested in staying at this beautiful house click HERE for details.

10 Craziest Tattoos

Tattoos have always been a tradition method of self-expression. But sometimes that self-expression expresses just a little too much and many times you just have to wonder what people were thinking when they decided to get these tattoos.
10.
To Do List Tattoo

Now this is an interesting tattoo but I think that eventually it may become a tattoo that they will regret. As someone who has a wrist tattoo having something that you are going to see almost constantly every day it really has to be something important and personal. But just maybe this tattoo will keep it’s novelty and be cool to the person who has it. At least I really hope so.

9. Six Pack Tattoo

I suppose if you know that you’re never going to get in shape then this might be a good idea seeing as it will be the closest thing you will ever get to a six pack. Though I think it also gives new meaning to the phrase “beer gut.” Sometimes you got to think about the reason people get tattoos because like other tattoos this is only funny the first time you see it.

8. I See You Tattoo

This is another unique tattoo that really I cannot understand why someone would get it. Sure I mean you do it once and it is kinda funny and it will definitely catch you off guard. But after that it gets old rather quick, so I think that the goal of this tattoo is to constantly keep meeting new people. Once again I think I can respect it but I think in the long run this could be a rather silly tattoo.


7. Cow Tattoo

Now there are a number of tattoos that utilize holes in the body in order to add another dimension to their tattoo. Many of the more disturbing and unique ones, use holes that well I was not comfortable sharing pictures of. Turning the belly button into an anus has become a… shall I say “popular” bizarre tattoo as I have seen it done with a few different animals. This is possibly the best of the worst but many of them I have seen with cats.


6 Alien Tattoo

This is a truly impressive tattoo and this would really make anyone double take when you walked by. This is a bizarre but really cool tattoo and unlike some of the others on this list I really don’t think there is too much to complain about. I would really like to hear the story behind this tattoo though and I would also like to see people’s first reactions when they see him walking by.

5. Zombie Boy Tattoo

This is a tattoo that I can respect because it takes a great deal of dedication (and apparently more than 24 hours and thousands of dollars) to turn yourself into a zombie. Now I personally do have a passion for something great enough to tattoo my entire body with it, so I think it is impressive that this guy does. But then again he might be a poster child for being overly obsessive about something…either way this is one really bizarre tattoo.

6 Baby on Board Tattoo

This tattoo is really bizarre on so many levels. First I don’t think getting a tattoo while pregnant is the best idea. Second, do they realize that eventually the baby will come out and that the tattoo won’t make sense anymore. Though I truly believe that having a child and being pregnant is something that is perfectly inspiration for a child, I would hope that it would have a bit more meaning and something more personal that this one

2. Legs Tattoo

Here is a tattoo that gets props for being creative but I’m not sure this is the type of creativity that is going to make him very popular with the ladies. After all who wants to date a man that has turned his armpit into a… well a… you know. I wonder if all of his guy friends thought this was brilliant or stupid because I could see a guy going either way on this one, a girl on the other hand…not so much.

2. Breakfast Anyone? Tattoo

Now you have to really love your eggs over easy with bacon and hashbrowns in order to get this tattoo. Bald heads are great places to get unique tattoos and I have seen plenty cool and unique ones. I will grant that this one is unique, but I really think that it is unique for a reason… Honestly I can’t understand the justification for a tattoo like this and I would really like to hear it.

1. Digit Tattoo

This tattoo is perhaps the most disturbing that I have ever seen and I’m not even sure why. I mean to make your arm look like a giant finger is undoubtedly creative, and if we’re being honest people are probably going to stare anyway, so why not give them something to really look at. But still I find this tattoo as creepy as it is creative.
If you decide to get your own tattoo make sure it is something that you can truly see yourself appreciating for the rest of your life. If you don’t like tattoos remember that not all tattoos are just to look silly or strange, some of them are very important and personal to the people who get them and that is something that should be respected. In the meantime enjoy the art!

Amazing 3D Tattoos


A tattoo artist Lane Jensen, 30, came up a creative idea to give silicone breast implants to his cowgirl tattoo in order to make “her” looks shapely. Unfortunately two weeks later, his body rejected them.

“My body just rejected it. I guess my girl wasn’t meant to have 3D breasts,” he said. “I thought it would make for good promotion. Augmenting tattoos with implants is becoming very popular,” said Jensen.

Lane Jensen, who is the co-owner of Dragon FX tattoo and body piercing shop at Kingsway Garden Mall, has more than 20 tattoos on his body and the sexy cowgirl tattoo on his left leg was done three years ago.

A friend of Jensen, Brian Decker, who is also a New York-based micro-dermal surgeon, performed the implant procedure on him. But two weeks later, the sutures split and lymphatic fluid drained from Jensen’s leg.

Jensen said, “there was so much fluid in there. I went back to the studio and pushed on it gently – the implant shot right out. The surgery was done in ideal conditions and Decker did a perfect job. It just goes to show you some people’s bodies won’t tolerate foreign objects.

“The body rejects 20% of them, no matter what kind of implant it is, how safely it’s done, or how skilled the surgeon or artist is. A lot of places won’t tell you rejection rates before you buy $10,000 implants to stuff inside your body.





Twitter Role Models: Drunk Marreese Speights Edition


Mr. Speights would like his fans to know that he got laid last night.  Personally, I've never been drunk to the point of "ass fuck", but I guess it depends on who you're with. 

Ladies, if you can't bang Marreese Speights for more than 30 minutes, don't get drunk "ass fuck" with him, please.

*As you might've guessed, this tweet has since been deleted. 

UPDATE! - the tweet is actually just some lyrics from the song Takin It There by Young Jeezy.  We apologize.  TheWizWit is disappointed as both fans of Jeezy and as fans of athletes using Twitter to describe sexual encounters.  Carry on.

The (Republican) Terrorists Have Already Won








(Crossposted on OpEd News.com and Brilliant at Breakfast.)

If one looks at SB 1070, Arizona's Gestapo-esque immigration law that went into effect yesterday despite a federal judge striking down key components of it, with clear eyes and takes note of all the fallout that's resulted, one realizes that the Arizona GOP actually got everything they ever asked for and probably a good deal more.

True, this explosion of hatred toward Latinos legal or otherwise, has had some less than salutary effects on the state's economy. But those repercussions will not be felt by the state GOP lawmakers but the average small business owner and landlord.

The benefits that the GOP is already seeing is the mass exodus of Latinos both legal and illegal, who have been leaving Arizona by the thousands. Who will actually suffer from this? Democrats who have come to rely on this same Latino voting bloc's reliably Democratic votes.

They also succeeded in making Arizona a lot whiter in a big hurry and without placing much of a burden on the state's limping economy and the state's penal system.

When SB 1070 was ratified in the Arizona legislature, 11 other states followed suit and either ratified or introduced legislation that would enforce similar measures against immigrants. The Arizona Republican Party is metastasizing.

Hell, even Judge Susan Bolton's highly critical ruling of SB 1070 has been hailed as a "huge victory" by the same whackjobs who'd co-authored it because Bolton couldn't or wouldn't completely eviscerate it.

And if you want to know how insanely xenophobic white Republicans have gotten, Iowa Republicans, I shit you not, want to strip President Barack Obama of his citizenship, hence get him thrown out of the White House, just for winning and accepting the Nobel Prize. They're basing this on a proposed amendment (the original 13th amendment, not the one that banned slavery) that failed in Congress exactly 200 years ago.

This is their platform, people, and we're letting it pay dividends. There's really no downside to the GOP's starkly batshit insane and irrational fear of brown people. Like the Bush administration was fond of saying, if we give in to fear, then the terrorists have already won.

Then they scared the shit out of us and it paid billions in dividends to war contractors. We let them steal our constitutional protections, our civil liberties eight years ago and we still haven't gotten them back.

Well, the terrorists have won again and they triumphantly rode in on a snow-white elephant.

A Big Ol’ Bowl of Win

It wasn’t that long ago boys and girls that our swashbuckling GM, Rubes Jr., traded an ace away for a few middling prospects. Well, just when I think he couldn’t possibly be any dumber, he goes and does something like this…AND TOTALLY REDEEMS HIMSELF!!!

We all beat up GM’s from time to time whether it’s for signing players to bad contracts, trading away prospects we love for crappy rental players or for not making trades we really think they should make. If a move doesn’t pay off, we chastise them for it. If it does work, well, we focus on the players who made it happen. For the most part, it’s a rather thank-less job. But, I really have to hand it to Ruben here, he pulled off quite the coup in the Oswalt deal. It’s enough of a coup actually, that I almost, but not quite, will consider forgiving him for the Cliff Lee Fiasco of 2010.

But, alas, this isn't about Cliff Lee (actually everything is always about Cliff Lee, but I digress). It's about a pitcher named Roy and a dream. A dream to win another World Series and fleece Ed Wade in the process. Did the Phillies realize this dream today? Let's find out.


Here’s the official breakdown:

Phillies Get:

RHP Roy Oswalt

$11,000,000

Ed Wade’s Manhood

Astros Get:

LHP JA Happ

OF Anthony Gose (who was immediately sent to the Blue Jays for 1B Brett Wallace, who was dealt from Oakland to Toronto for ex-Phillies prospect Michael Taylor)

SS Jonathan Villar

If that seems almost too good to be true, it’s because it pretty much is. Considering the Phillies obtained a top 30 pitcher (which is what Oswalt still is) without giving up ANY top prospects (Gose is the closest at #6 per Baseball America) is unbelievable. It’s become apparent that the cost for a good starter (as proven last week as well in the Dan Haren trade) isn’t as high as fans thought. When only a few teams in baseball can afford to take on salary (like the Phillies somehow can) it really limits the number of options team looking to trade have. This, thankfully, dramatically lowered the cost for Oswalt. For most of the morning I heard a lot of names thrown around, but in the end all the top guys like Singleton, Colvin and Cosart remain. That’s good news as the Phillies get better in 2010 and 2011, while still keeping all their high ceiling talent they’ll need to be good in 2012 and beyond. No matter how you slice it, a rotation of Halladay, Hamels, Lee…er…Oswalt looks pretty formidable for the next year +2 months.

So what can we expect from Oswalt? Well, I’d say a 7-4 record with a 3.39 ERA and 74 K’s in 79 IP. The playoffs? Probably a 4-0 record with a 1.56 ERA. Wait, what? Oh, I hadn’t noticed. Those are the exact stats that Cliff Lee put up last year? Interesting. Purely a coincidence, I promise. Ok, I lied, I did that on purpose…but really I expect good things from Roy #2. He’s pitched in big games (he was the 2005 NLCS MVP) and sports a lifetime ERA of 3.24. His K/9 rate is the highest it’s been since his rookie season and he wants to win. Sounds like a guy I want on my side for the stretch run.

To be honest though, I can’t give all the credit to Amaro. Really, he had a lot of help from Ed Wade (unless you believe the report that Astros owner Drayton McLane handled the negotiations directly with David Montgomery, which would be like having two Walrus’s try to decide how much plutonium to put in a bomb, while also fixing our national deficit and figuring out an exit strategy for the Middle East). Trading with Ed Wade is like having your friend buy you a hooker, it’s free and easy sex so you have do it, but it always leaves you feeling dirty and like you ripped him off. So while I can’t blame Amaro for taking advantage of a (PC LANGUAGE ALERT) mentally handicapped person, I still can’t give him full credit. It might not be as easy as taking candy from a baby, but it’s definitely as easy as catching a blowie from a fat chick.

Anyway, this trade puts the Phillies a whole lot closer to a third straight trip to the World Series. Is it a guarantee? Definitely not, but I really like our chances now. The only mini-negative is that we gave up a high-ceiling infielder, something we don’t have much of in our system, and a controllable #5 starter for the next four seasons. But, we won’t miss Gose since we have similar players all over our system in Tyson Gillies, Jiwan James and a host of other ‘toolsy’ outfielders. So as long as Mr. Happ doesn’t develop into Cliff Lee, we’re good. And that has about as much of a chance of happening as me banging a stripper in Vegas during my bachelor party. Which means it would never happen. Cause I don't do that kind of stuff. It's gross. Totally gross.

Go Phils. Let's do it again.

Stange Body Modification and Body Piercings From Around the World

People get piercings for every reason, from tradition all the way to rebellion. Different kinds of piercings can be found all around the world, but one thing that we can be sure of is that piercings from some countries are unique and very bizarre.

The woman shown above is Brazilian lady Elaine Davidson, who currently holds the world record for being the most pierced woman in the world. She has 720 piercings and counting. She currently lives in Scotland

Rather than getting piercings that excel in quantity, sometimes the bizarre factor is accentuated in quality. The Vegetarian Festival in Phuket, Thailand involves the extreme piercing of Ma Song or religious devotees to the festivals, who stick everything from swords to bikes in their cheeks. They do this so they can shift evil from the community onto themselves.


Luis Aguero from Havana, Cuba was previously the most pierced man in the world. He has 230 piercings, and 175 are on his face alone!


In Africa, earlobe stretching is a custom within the Maasai tribe, located in Kenya and Northern Tanzania. This kind of stretching is more common amongst the women than the men of the tribe. They often use stones, thorns, and twigs to create these piercings, and to begin the stretching.


In northwest India, the Meghwal women show their status with their nose piercings. Married women often wear gold nose rings, and the size of the nose ring shows their status in society. The bigger the nose ring is, the more important they are in their society.

In the United States, piercings are mostly used for simply aesthetic purposes rather than for tradition or custom. The girl above has vertical labret piercings, and a nose piercing. As piercings are becoming more and more acceptable in society, and the professional environment, more and more Americans are getting piercings. Although it may look bizarre to some, to the people who choose this path, it is a way of life, and what they believe. To them piercings mean more than just holes in their bodies filled with metal - they symbolise tradition, decoration, and custom.

She F*cking Hates Meeeeee!!!

Is this dude the starting quarterback for the Philadelphia Eagles or the guy who put up drywall in your office last week while listening to Puddle of Mudd? You decide.

Courtesy of Todd Herremans' (surprisingly entertaining) Twitter page.

You're Never Too Old to Fail


...or to be scammed.

As further proof that, aside from Mrs. Jurassicpork and a handful of kind readers, there is literally no one on the planet who has any use for me except as a source of income. Whether it be my landlord, utility companies, my kids' custodial family, literary agents, temp agencies and the like, my personal worth to them is directly proportionate to my potential for putting cha-ching in someone's pocket.

Take Cambridge House Books, for instance. Some of you may remember that, last May 25th, I wrote a post lauding these people after I got one of their emails and checked them out. The first one or two emails I got from one of their so-called editors, Rachel Trusheim, only further encouraged me.

Then I got around to telling Rachel that, even though I was a blogger, my daily readership could be counted in the hundreds and that, oh yeah, I'd been unemployed for 13 months. Call it coincidence or not, but the enthusiastic letters exhorting me to submit American Zen suddenly got briefer, cooler, terser and far less frequent when Cambridge House Books got wind of my insolvency.

Eventually, when I badgered Trusheim into giving me some resolution regarding AZ, I was told in no uncertain terms that, since I didn't have the marketing potential of a Bill O'Reilly (whom she'd used as an example), I would have to underwrite half the publishing expenses if they chose my book. Otherwise, I was too big of a "risk."

I never got anything resembling any resolution regarding whether Cambridge House's editorial board ever decided on it but perhaps news of my pecuniary state helped speed along their non-decision. By this time, I'd already sent them a proposal for another novel that, officially speaking, still hasn't been acknowledged much less decided upon. That was in late May when I sent it off. I sent Trusheim an email a month later wondering aloud if the fact I was living on unemployment for the second year had anything to do with the fact that her communiques got less frequent than Osama bin Laden's. I'm still eagerly awaiting her response.

Basically, Cambridge House Books (I refuse to link to these con artists and I removed the link in the referenced post) is a scam organization, a gussied up vanity press looking for people who either have money to defray their overhead expenses or have a national audience that will guarantee sales so their publicity department won't have to do as much work.

In other words, they're no different from publishers and literary agencies except for this one crucual difference: Publishers underwrite 100% of the publication expenses and virtually all of the publicity expenses and legit literary agencies get paid by you only after they sell your book. Cambridge House will charge you thousands up front if they arbitrarily decide you're too big of a risk to take on as an author, especially a first time novelist whose name isn't Glenn Beck.

Now, it would be easy to make this a personal gripe but this is an experience that many of us, writer or not, share. My experience is only synecdochal of that of many others. What set me off today on my latest rampage was the email I got from these predatory, opportunistic cocksuckers asking me to give them another chance to help them help me to help them.

My response was so vitriolic, I hesitate to recount even here to my veteran readers what I told them in response this morning but it involved tender orifices and rough sticks.

It's bad enough when literary agents and editors have turned the publishing business into a giant glorified vanity press. It's more self-serve than ever before and, as with temp agencies, they demand experience, education, credentials and a track record that very few of us in the real world actually have.

A couple of decades ago, I sold a slogan to a button company that read, "Fortune Favors Those Who Have One." I was barely out of my 20's when I wrote that but my youthful cynicism had proven to be more justified and timely than ever. Fortune does favor those who have one, as if wealth and or power ought to be self-sustaining, as if one's personal manifest destiny ought to snowball despite limitations of talent and a propensity for prevarication and moral putrefaction.

The bottom line is, if you're poor and obscure, your chances of succeeding at anything in this world is limited to the point of guaranteed futility. Millions are spent troweling out crap like Going Rogue or The Overton Window, books attributed to right wing racists and ghost-written by right wing racists, as long as you have a national platform.

Never mind the fact that their "authors" got rich and are getting richer by scrawling the absurdest conspiracy theories on blackboards and saying "Drill, Baby, Drill!" and "hopey changey" to millions of drooling idiots. The fact is that Beck, Palin and other no-talent brain transplant candidates have gotten the attention of millions of mouth-breathers. That automatically gives them about 100 more legs up in the business than anyone like me. Talent isn't even secondary.

Now, in order to be "qualified" to be a novelist, you have to either have a massive presence on the web, be an acknowledged expert in one profession or another or be a celebrity. Talent is no longer a qualifier. In fact, once editors and agents find out you've never been put between covers, that's usually strike one. The current, short-sighted business models governing publishing and job careers requires spontaneous history despite no one wanting to take a chance on the uninitiated and inexperienced. Temp agencies and actual employers, for instance, are making an official/unofficial policy of ignoring the unemployed just as literary agencies are ignoring the unpublished.

Look at our current political structure. Sometime during the 80's, some fucking genius got it into his head that we should allow millionaires to run for Congress and the White House so they won't be tainted by campaign money.

How's that hopey changey thing worked out for us? The system simply got more corrupt than ever and, thanks to the Supreme Court, will get more corrupt than Tammany Hall's wildest, wettest dreams. Now, Congress and one White House after another is overrun by out-of-touch robber baron sociopaths who don't have any clue what it feels like to have to decide between food or health care, people who have never touched a snow shovel or rake in their lives or had to literally count out pocket change or had to hold back groceries at the store checkout.

Audaciously, we're then blamed for finding ourselves in this hole even when these same naysayers and detractors are the ones who pulled up the rope ladder.

I Have a Stiffy For Domonic Brown (Pause)

I was lucky enough to be in attendance of last night's Domonic Brown debut. The above video was taken to document the first career at-bat of the future Hall of Famer. I couldn't have been any more excited going into this game - I've been waiting for this call up for quite some time. When I received a text from a friend letting me know the call up was official, I creamed a little. Just a little.  Seriously though, the guy is going to be really good for a long time. You’ve heard of 5-tool players before? Brown has 7. He has tools people didn’t even know existed.

I realize the video is a little far away (we taped this from our season seat's in right field on cell phone), but it's more about the crowd's reaction than anything else. Dom Brown was fully welcomed by this fan base last night and it provided the stadium with a little more electricity than usual. The shakiness of the camera is actually due to the minor earthquake caused by the rocketing of Brown's double.

I'll be visiting Modell's in the coming days to purchase my Dom Brown merchandise. I suggest you do the same.


UPDATE! I've included a clip of what I believe should be Dom Brown's intro music. Shout out to Das Racist, who you may know from their Combination Pizza Hut/Taco Bell jam.

Your Cross-dressing Roy Oswalt Update

It's being reported everywhere that Oswalt is a waived no-trade clause away from being a Phillie. It's certain that JA Happ will be sent to Houston to die a death brought on by lack of run support. Nobody knows anything about how the money will work in the deal, or what prospects are involved.

In case you're wondering, (to our knowledge) Roy Oswalt isn't really a cross-dresser. That pic is from his rookie year in what I'm guessing was some type of hazing. So there's really no update there, just a picture that wasn't Oswalt in mid-throwing motion.

TheWizWit will give you a full analysis later if this thing actually happens. Remember when Cliff Lee was a Yankee a couple weeks ago? Yeah, anything can fall through.


[pic via Alyson's Footnotes - MLB Blog Network: Houston Astros]

World Strange Places (Part 4) - Rare Photos and Information...

White Terraces



Natural Wonders from New Zealand that just memories because destroyed by the Tarawera volcanic eruption in 1886. The natural phenomenon of warm water that formed by geysers that blast down the hillside across the thickness of ice left, the largest pool of warm water was recorded around 3 acres. Before the destruction of this phenomenon, It belongs to ” The Eighth Wonder of the World “.











Bathing at the White Terrace



Before the eruption of Mt Tarawera in 1886, the Pink and White Terraces at Rotomahana were a spectacular tourist attraction. The terraces had natural silica basins where you could bathe. When English novelist Anthony Trollope sampled one of the pools in the early 1870s he wrote, ‘The baths are … like vast open shells, the walls of which are concave, and the lips ornamented in a thousand forms … I have never heard of other bathing like this in the world.’ Here, three men (one Pākehā and two Māori) share a bath at the White Terrace, about 1880. Racially mixed bathing became less usual in the later 19th century.





Rice Terraces



In Luzon Province of the Northern Philippines, through mountains and rice terraces, the road ends at a church, in a small town called Banaue. 4,000 feet above sea level in Banaue sits a small market village in Ifugao province. Located north of Manila in the Philippines, Ifugao province is famous for the handiwork of its people, who increased cultivable lands by carving gigantic rice terraces from the sides of mountains. For over 2,000 years, the people of Batad have built these terraces, one stone at a time.





This growing, living stairway stretches far beyond what the eye can see. Taking an estimated 2,000 years to build, the still-productive rice terraces rise from the valley floor to heights of up to 3,000 feet, a feat of engineering so substantial that some call them the eighth wonder of the world. The only man made wonder which was literally sculpted from the earth. A scarcity of water has led to some rice patties drying up.The mountainous rice terraces of Banaue and vicinity in the Philippines are mankind’s grandest scaled engineering feat. The vertical distance between bottom and top rows exceeds the height of the world’s tallest building. If the terraces were laid end to end, they would stretch half way around the world.







Banaue is known for its rice terraces built along the mountains sides like stairways reaching the sky. 2000 years ago Ifugao's constructed it by using their bare hands and & wood as tools. The terraces are located in Banaue, Hungduan, Kiangan & Mayoyao. Banaue rice terraces are dubbed as the 8th Wonder of the World . Batad is a popular for its amphitheater-shaped terraces & the cascading Tappiyah Waterfall.















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