We’re plunged right into the world of the Kardashian Clan.
Flash back to eight weeks earlier in Los Angeles. Kim calls him “husband!” Her new (temporary,
as it turns out) husband Kris Humphries replies “wifey!” It’s right after their honeymoon in Italy, and they’re about to move to NY for fashion week.
Wow, he is about a foot and a half taller than her. He picks her up then falls on the bed with her.
Kourtney booked a two-story suite at the Gansevoort hotel, so they can live with Kim and Kris. She and Scott have different rooms. And Scott is jealous of the baby, hoping being in NY will give them a chance at a fresh start.
Kourtney’s holistic lifestyle irritates everyone. Scott doesn’t like kale chips, and neither does baby Mason, who makes a face after tasting one. Kim resists an enema treatment at the ayurvedic spa, and back at the hotel when Kourtney leaks on the bed everyone’s grossed out. Kourtney thinks naked yoga will ease the tension; that’s the final straw which prompts Kris to tell his wife she has to move out. But in the end it’s Kris who moves, to do basketball training in Minnesota.
Kim realizes that marriage means living with someone. She hates that Kris is messy, that he doesn’t like red carpet events. Kris gets a lot of dumb frat guy edits. She yells at him when he messes up her pedicure. He tells the camera she’s a classic overreactor. He’s a newly-married guy, living with his wife, his wife’s trouble-making sister, a baby, and the wife’s boyfriend. He’s kind of a jerk but he’s got some cause. The baby wakes him up in the morning, which interferes with his work out. That sounds dumb but hey, he’s a professional athlete. Kim apparently sleeps in full makeup. Ew, she licks his face.
You definitely get the feeling neither one of them really thought this through. She wants a celebrity lifestyle, he just happens to be a celebrity because he’s an athlete.
The men bond over the women not being ready on time for the Welcome to New York party. Somehow this leads to Kris shaving Scott’s armpits. Kourtney watches and mocks them–and who can blame her?
Kourtney tells Kris that Scott is moving out. When Kris tries to suggest that some of this might be Kourtney’s control issues, she still tries to paint herself as a victim. Scott goes to confide in his pal Jonathan.
The sisters bond. And Kourtney says Kris tells her he said he’s purposely a slob to annoy her. Kourtney doesn’t want to be the only sister without a man, I think.
Kim thinks she should be supportive when Kris says he needs to go. But the handwriting is on the wall here, and in the previews for next week, when Kim cries tears of self-pity about what she wanted from life.
