Oh, You Thought This Was Cool?

You were sorely mistaken, hombre. I'm not even sure what exactly it is you're going for here, but I can assure you it's not funny or clever. This customized piece of doo-doo is nothing but a colossal waste of money. No one is seriously tapping you on the shoulder to compliment you on this glorified sweat rag without immediately turning back to his friends for some chuckles.

It's a little sad considering the guy appears to be an older gentleman. I base that on the scientific evidence of his old-looking back-of-the-head and on account of the quarter turtleneck peeking out from under the jersey. The poor fella probably has no idea how dumb this purchase was, or why he always gets stuck with the ugly chicks.

h/t Joe Sports Fan

SAVINGS ALERT: Buy One, Get 50% off All Dignity!

Custom logo’d jeans for MEN.

Holy shitballs. These are horrifying. I can't fathom any situation where NFL.com has sold a single pair of these monstrosities. You just know they have a whole warehouse full of classic, uncomfortable, stonewash straight-legged denim just waiting to have the Eagles logo emblazoned across the ass cheeks.

Ladies, if you’re considering buying these for your man, you might as well save yourself $74.99 and just give the lucky fella a swift punch to the dick. That pain will at least be temporary. These jeans will haunt him forever in the form of humiliating jokes from his buddies.

BONUS: 

NFL.com doesn't stop there.  There's a way that you too can walk all over the Cowboys this year!

Have an annoying and illogical Dallas Cowboy fan in your life? Search for their Christmas gift no longer! After losing to the Saints on Thanksgiving, the Cowboys are officially guaranteed of a non-winning season. They're at the cellar of the NFC East and have rolled over and been trampled by nearly 75% of their competition this year.

NFL.com is also selling team "rugs" as part of their Black Friday holiday sale. Now, let's not kid ourselves folks – I know a doormat when I see one. It only becomes confirmed when you stamp the Cowboys logo on it and proceed to use it for wiping dog doo doo off your sneakers. Could there be a more appropriate gift??

In all seriousness: This thing comes with a price tag of $79.99. Regardless of the team you choose or whether you’re using it as a legit area rug or gag gift - who in the hell is spending that kind of scratch on a rug doormat? There has to be something in life you actually need that you could spend that money on. Or how about charity? No? NFL doormat? Okay then.

Ron Artest Wouldn’t Even Do This

Here we have Kobe Bryant and family celebrating the NBA Championship in Disneyland.

Is it me, or is Kobe committing a pretty big foul here? You can't go around wearing a t-shirt featuring a big picture of your OWN face. Didn't anyone tell him the lead singer can't wear a shirt with the name of the band on it? If nothing else, it just looks… uh, goofy (PUN INTENDED! HONK, HONK!)

Seriously though… come on Kobe, you're better than that.


[Pic via Ocean County Register thru 'Recommended Reading' at the700level]