Showing posts with label training camp. Show all posts
Showing posts with label training camp. Show all posts

Did You know Philadelphia has a Pro Basketball Team?

I bet you didn’t. Or you forgot. Or you've been suppressing the memories of a terrible 2009 campaign deep into the recesses of your mind. But check it, this year’s team really can’t be any worse – or more importantly – any more frustrating to watch as the Eddie Jordan-led Sixers.

Yesterday Sixers training camp began and Kate Fagan wrote a great article on Philly.com. Using her words as inspiration, we've taken a few of the best parts from the article and added a little of TheWizWit commentary you've become accustomed to.  After the jump, we touch on a few players, a little philosophy, and cap it off with a very telling quote by world-renowned scholar and philanthropist Marreese Speights.

All of Kate Fagan's words (and quote's she received) are in bold.  Our uninformed commentary follows.

Collins was running through some 5-on-0 drills and he initially used a "starting" lineup of PG Jrue Holiday, SG Iguodala, SF Thaddeus Young, PF Elton Brand, and C Spencer Hawes. His second unit was PG Lou Williams, SG Evan Turner, SF Jodie Meeks, PF Trent Plaisted, C Marreese Speights.
Only surprise here is that Turner wasn’t running with the starters. Don’t get too upset though, I seriously doubt this will be the starting 5 in January. Oh, and no way Trent Plaisted makes this team.
"You can talk a lot of basketball with him, which is a lot of fun. I had a conversation with him about how the defense will be playing me and how he can make certain passes from the elbow. He has a lot of input so we can relate a whole lot, we can adjust. He's kind of like Peyton Manning. He's able to do some of the same things as far as being a big man who can deliver passes ... really had a great practice with Spencer and I can tell we're going to be connecting a whole lot." -Andre Iguodala on new Center Spencer Hawes

Spencer Hawes = Peyton Manning? Probably the worst comparison ever. But don’t be too hard on Iggy -- TheWizWit’s very own Maurice has confirmed that this is probably just black people code for “white athlete that doesn't play defense”. Either way this is good news because Sammy D couldn’t do any of the things Iguodala mentioned in the quote.
Collins feels Young and Nocioni are two of the team's better players, he said it wouldn't make sense for the team to have both players on the bench at the start of the game.


“I hope [Nocioni] becomes a 20-minute a night guy for us," Collins said. "I told him today, 'We’re building.'
Well this makes me sad. If this team is ‘building’ wouldn’t you play more of the younger guys? I don’t really want to see Nocioni on the court very much. If he’s getting chunks of minutes, then Collins is trying to squeeze out wins now. That’s fine if that is what he wants to do, but the team would be better served growing slowly with the core group of young guys that will be here for a while.  Collins wants to win games, he just has to make sure he's not impeding the teams' progression to do so.
“Darius [Songaila] is very hard-nosed player," Collins said.
This is coach speak for “offers no real, tangible contributions to a basketball team”. Also see: gritty, tough, David Eckstein.
"He’s a facilitator, right now. He’s a guy who loves to get other guys involved. And that’s what I want him to be right now. And as he goes along, I want him and Jrue and Dre and those guys to play together and all of a sudden he gets more of a scoring mentality." -Doug Collins on Evan Turner
Makes sense. Collins will build Turner’s confidence in a facilitator role with the second team of guys (LouWill, Speights, Nocioni, etc) and that should lead to a natural progression of him more comfortably moving into a scorer’s role. Again, even if Turner isn’t starting when the 2010 season begins, he’s going to get big minutes and will be on the court with Jrue and Iggy Dre plenty. Which reminds me – I really wish Iguodala would embrace the Iggy nickname but he insists he be called Dre. Can you really give yourself a nickname? This did not work well for George Costanza and T-Bone. Just sayin'.
"Nobody had a role out there last year. We were just out there playing Princeton. It was a disaster last year, so we’re not going to talk about that." -Marreese Speights
This one line couldn’t sum up the 2009 Sixers any better. They were a turd sandwich wrapped in a poopy diaper.  And that diaper was probably made of recycled poopy diapers.  Just a fantastic quote by Speights. Here’s to changing the culture and making strides towards putting a competitive squad on the floor.

Go Sixers.

What Can the Eagles Trade To Get Rex Ryan?

Goddamn Rex Ryan is entertaining. To anyone who has ever read Drew Magary's comedic interpretation of Rex Ryan, last night's Hard Knocks with the Jets on HBO was a complete mindfuck. The line between art and life was so blurry that the whole hour just turned into hilarious and inspirational foul-mouthed soundbytes from Buddy's son. Hell, at one point Bart Scott even called Mark Sanchez "Nacho," which is Magary's Rex Ryan's nickname for his hispanic QB.

Whether it was Rex's speech on "leading the league in fucking wins" (see below) or telling his team that they'll have a better "fucking" vacation than him because he'll "be cruising around the Baltic with the in-laws and shit," the whole thing was dripped up and draped out in awesome.

So...Maclin and a 4th? I'D DO THAT DEAL RIGHT NOW.



Brandon Graham Wears Business (Really)Casual

Playbook? Check.
Blue Gatorade? Check.
Shirt? ...Shit.

Photo courtesy of @TrevorLaws

2010 Eagles Flight Night: Injury Odds!

Eagles "Flight Night" is tomorrow and to commemorate the second year of this profit-generating glorified practice, we're placing odds on injuries to your favorite players!

As you may recall, the birds lost their starting MLB at last years event to an ACL injury. Maybe it was the curse of Jim Johnson. Maybe it was karma's revenge on an organization that tries to squeeze every last dime from a championship-starved fanbase. Whatever the reason, StewBrad went down and with him so did the Eagles' defensive ferociousness.

So how bout Flight Night 2010? Lets go to the odds-makers!



Cornelius Ingram
Knee injury - 1:1
Ankle injury - 2:1
Injured pride from losing job to dude named Clay - 3:2



 

Max-Jean Gilles
Exploding lap-band gross eew - 10:1
Breast cancer - 50:1








Victor Abiamiri
Getting re-reinjured while standing on sidelines - 4:1









Andy Reid
EPIC HEART ATTACK - 20:1
Oxycontin overdose - 200:1






DeSean Jackson
Back injury - 15:1
Twisted ankle from 'Jerkin' - 25:1
Crashing Porsche into facility - 55:1






Trent Cole
"High" motor reset to "Average" motor - 60:1







Brent Celek
Over abundance of Captain in him - 40:1







Stewart Bradley
Re-injured Knee - 15:1
Insufficient Swagger - 5:1







Mike Vick
Herpes flare-up - 10:1






Kevin Kolb
Rotator cuff injury from throwing too many perfect and awesome slants - 30:1








Riley Cooper
Raw buttock from everyone kissing his ass - 2:1





Todd Herremans
Raped in his own shady-ass van - 75:1






Place ya bets!

You Might Be a Philly Fan If...






















You read this article one day...

and this one the next.

......And this one.


Oh, and these. Happy August!

Madden Imitating Life or Life Imitating Madden?

All the real Madden fans out there -- the fantasy drafters, the ones who stand in line at midnight, the guy whose combination of dominance and arrogance starts fights amongst his friends and online 15 year-old's alike -- fully understand what's really goin on with LB Moises Fokou now playing DE: Andy Reid is using Madden techniques to increase his stats.

As you may know, there is a feature in the Madden video game that allows you to change a players position thus altering his overall rating at that position. Sometimes, depending on the player, your moving of a LB to a DE will result in a stat increase. Sometimes it's a big increase.

Now don't come at me with all this logical coaches-have-been-doing-that-for-years-and-that's-why-the-friggin-feature-is-in-the-game nonsenseness. I'M NOT FEELIN THAT RIGHT NOW. Madden came out in 1989 when Sean McDermott was 15 years old. As a teenager who loved football...cmon. His ass was gaming.

Or at least that's what I have convinced myself for the sake of this post.  Moving a so-so LB to the DE spot is a classic Madden move that any advanced gamer abuses.  McDermott is showing his youth right here and I like it.  Also, doesn't this seem like something the Eagles do a lot?  Alex Hall, Ricky Sapp, Daniel T'e-w8323R2D2, Chris Gocong...what positions do  these guys play?  Why are the Eagles constantly trying to cheat the game out of a couple ratings points?

But yeah, sure.  Try Fokou at DE.  Maybe he can get in on this 20-man D-line rotation.


Completely unrelated: you know what makes me happy? Morning tweets from Kanye West that say shit like "This is gonna be a dope ass day" and Saturday 2AM tweets that say "GREEEEEEEY GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSE!!!! hahhahahahahaaaaaa!" That motherfocker is brilliance on ice.

Live From Training Camp...Online Coverage

Am I at Eagles training camp right now live blogging from the sidelines? No.
At I at my computer watching 22-minute long clips of practice highlights? Yes, ma'am.

Some observations taken from the first full-pads practice:
1:35 - Mike Bell was a smart pick up.  After this J.J. Arrington trade, it's hard to guess how the birds will play their hand.  Maybe this was just trading Joe Mays for a draft pick, maybe not. If they keep three backs...who will be the third behind Shady and Bell?  Charles Scott looks promising (4:20, 5:00), incumbent Eldra Buckley was an effective special teams player, J.J. has great hands and can return kicks -- this is one of the more interesting camp battles.
3:40 - Kevin Kolb with the big "fuck you" to (so far impressive) rookie S Kurt Coleman.
5:45 - Vick shows off some lateral quickness
6:50 - Ellis Hobbs with a big defended pass against Baskett, trying to ease our concerns for the cornerback position.
7:15 - Kolb deep pass to Jackson.  Pretty play but Joselio Hansen getting beat on this underthrown ball brings my concerns for cornerback...back.   
9:10 - Big stack-up hit by Jabar Chaney on Eldra Buckley
12:25, 20:00 - Brandon Graham looks pretty damn good to me. Spadaro pants, "Oo Great move." If you listen closely, you can almost hear the orgasm as it happens.
12:50 - You know who else looks good?  Our boy Trev "Obey the" Laws. Whooooop!
21:40 - FIIIIIIGHT! Daniel Te'o-Nesheim (who sucks, apparently) gets into it with Jerrail McCuller (who oddly enough has his arm around another dude in not one but two Google images), probably because he was frustrated by his own absolute terribleness.  Nothing happened and it was all very pointless.

Hey, at least nobody got hurt.  Oh wait.

Internet Football Stalking

As nerdy as it is, watching videos on the Philadelphia Eagles website shows you a hell of a lot more than reading words on a page from some dude (i.e. me).

I tell myself that I watch these videos because I run a Philly sports blog and need to be as informed as possible, but that's not the truth. The truth is...I just love this crap. While Dave Spadaro is a goofy cornball who loves the Eagles so much that he probably owns bird porn, the dude is harmless. Plus the mixed guy (Chris McPherson) seems on top of his game and the sarcastic little one's name is BO WULF so he's cool by me.

Also, if you're someone who plays fantasy football it behooves you to know what the shit you're talking about. Should you draft C.J. Spiller or Dez Bryant? Watching bullshit like camp footage or player bios is the only way to find out.  This junk is genius!

Patrick Crayton (COLON)...Underdog! The story of a man who will be paid $2.5 million this year to work LESS, but has to overcome the devastation of being married to a woman named Najiyyah.

Where was I? Oh yeah, below is a clip of the afternoon practice on training camp day 1. Unfortunately, it only features rookies and selected veterans selected dudes named Kevin Kolb and Mike Vick.


My observations:
Kolb's arm looks better than advertised | Vick is inaccurate | Bradley Riley Cooper catches everything | Cornelius Ingram appears to have working legs.

What do you see? (Very loud and auto-playing) video after the jump.






So Duce Staley is a Fatty Now

Duce was at Lehigh today to check out his former team, do some interviews with CSN, and make everyone regret the fast food they had for lunch.

Chunker or not, Duce is rightfully a big fan favorite in this town. I'd love to leave you with some Duce highlights circa Pickle Juice game of '00.  However, amazingly enough, no highlights seem to exist on the Internet from Duce's playing days.  Seriously, I couldn't find any.  If you're disappointed, theres this one from college. 

So if you forgot what Duce looked liked before he packed it on, here you go.



And here's one of Grimace.  Obviously for no related reason whatsover.


IT HAS BEGUN

OOOOOOOO Eagles Training Camp started today and Nate Allen is signed and Kevin Kolb looks sharp and rookies are impressing coaches and Dez Bryant is already a bigger dickhead than Desean Jackson and Madden comes out soon and when you win the Super Bowl you get to have a parade and meet frickin ObamaByah!
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