Choosing Love and Forgiveness

A few nights ago, I was pretty tired and grumpy with my husband just before bed.

I knew the grumpy words exchanged before we went to sleep were my fault, so when I woke up in the middle of the night I left a sappy note on his sink. 

 It led to his usual kiss on the forehead before he left for work.

 

Then, later that morning I text him.

ME:   Truth - Sorry, I took my mood out on you. Have a good day.

HIM:  Dare - I dare to love you through every annoying time and fantastic time. Hehe, love you!!!

  ME:  LOL! I Double Dare you baybay!

...from there we sent a few jokes back and forth and it ended with...

 

HIM: LOL! I love you!!!!

   

Funny isn’t it? 

How silly little things, like being tired can affect our mood with each other and how we have the option to let those little things turn into BIG things or to swallow our pride and resolve the issues immediately.

When it comes to our relationships, we can choose pride, stubbornness and anger, or we can choose love.

It takes something as simple as one person choosing to apologize and acknowledge when they are at fault, and the other person choosing to forgive, instead of holding onto a grudge.

Truth: My marriage is not a perfect marriage, but because of the lack of stubbornness, the willingness to apologize, the ability to be silly with each other, it sometimes feels like we are close!

It is flawed, but it is also forgiving.

 
It is fallible, but it is also uplifting.

  

Our Father gives us the knowledge we need and the ability to do the right thing when it comes to making choices that will foster healthy, happy relationships.

  Our relationships will never be perfect, because as people we are not perfect.

However, our relationships can be filled with so much happiness and love.

When we work towards learning to love each other as the Lord desires us to, it becomes a habit to focus on the positive qualities of others and to cover their flaws with acceptance!

Christ has taught us to keep forgiveness in our heart at all costs.

We were made to love each other.

It’s an expectation that may not always be easy as easy as we'd like, but how fortunate we are to have the opportunity to love and be loved. 

I Think of You Every Minute of Every Day

The other day, as we were riding in the car, I told my stepdaughter that every time I see a Petsmart, I think of her.

My stepdaughter laughed and repeated what I said to her sister, “Did you hear that Jocelyn? Every time mom sees a Petsmart she thinks of me.”

And Jocelyn, our other daughter said, "Well, that's okay, because 

she thinks of me every minute of every day.”

I could not help but laugh.









My kids, who know how much I love them,

are still constantly seeking love, attention and approval.

Not just from each other, not just from their friends, but from us - their parents.

I thought of the kids that do not have that.

 

Each day as I pick up my girls from school, I see a half a dozen children get picked up for a local group home. I can see them standing in line with each other joking, laughing, smiling and waiting.

And I wonder…

Are they smiling on the inside?
 

They are not waiting for a parent to pick them up like most children.

They are not going to jump in their family car.

They are not going home to do homework with siblings.

They are not going home to eat a snack that was prepared by a parent whose day revolved around picking that child up from school and getting them home safely.

They are waiting for a group leader, someone who is paid to pick them up, take them to their group home and who leaves when their shift is up.

Yet, there they stand, in front of the school, smiling.
 

They are so precious.

Do they know that?
 

Do they have anyone that tells them that they are?

Does anyone tell them that they matter?
  

That they have a purpose.

That they are loved.

That someone is thinking of them.

The other day, I read an article about this little boy he never even had a chance.

All he needed was someone to intercede on his behalf?

What was this mother thinking?

Where was this little boy's family?

Was there not a community around that saw the signs?

At his tender age, did he ever feel special or loved?

My heart hurts for these kids, 

but the sad truth is that their little hearts

hurt more.
 
I wonder what difference really could be made if…

if we did not just pause to think of them, or pray when we passed them by, but what if we actually did something?

Instead of running to the store, to spend our extra money on another pair of shoes to add to our collection, what if we got online and chose to sponsor a child? (All God's Children)

What if we cooked dinner for one month straight (instead of spending money on restaurants) and used the extra money to donate to a cause? (Children without a Voice)

Or rather than driving our kids to the mall to spend their allowance on another shirt or a video game, what if we encouraged them to donate their money to a local church or charity? (Simply Love) 

 





















My kids worry about chores, homework, and bedtime. From time to time, I see them worrying about bigger issues, like their grandma’s Alzheimers and wanting to help those in need.

But I wonder if they really understand how fortunate they are to have been born to parents who love and would do anything for them and a country that carries out laws to protect them and our freedom?

Tonight I will tuck my children into bed, say a prayer and we will kiss each other good night.

But tonight my thoughts are a million miles away.

Tonight, my thoughts are with those children that are going to bed alone and hungry, hoping they will survive another day.

Tonight, I am thinking about the children that will never get to have a parent tell them, 

"I think of you every minute of every day."

In the Shape of Us

I heard

In the Shape of Us, by Ian Britt 

on Parenthood,

last week 

and after crying my eyes out during the last episode,

I have been playing it

everyday since!

I am totally loving

the lyrics!

...so chill,

...so simple,

...so lovely!

In the Shape of Us, Ian Britt

You are no longer alone.

We found a space to name our own.

Ain't no need to fret or fuss,

we've got all the strength we need in the shape of us.

In the shape of us.

I know you've had it tough,

the road's been bumpy and rough.

Let's say good-bye to the world that you once knew,

I have every faith in me and you.

Hold my hand.

Hold my heart.

Let go of your fears.

Darling, I will always be here.

I never felt quite so at home.

Your sweet caress is the best I've known.

Now that I've proved to you, I am worthy of your trust

let us build a world in the shape of us.

In the shape of us.

Hold my hand.

Hold my heart.

Let go of your fears.

Darling, I will always be here.

Darling I will always be here.

***********

These sweet love songs always remind me of my hubby

and his loving, patient ways.

Although,

this song also reminded me of God's love.

...powerful, steady and true.

The title alone

is

just

beautiful.

Taking the Scenic View: Thoughts on Creating and Keeping a Healthy Perspective on Life

"That's life."

"It’s part of life."

"That is how life goes."

It seems as though

I’ve been saying these types of things a lot lately.

I was talking with my hubby the other day,

because at times I wonder if

I am a little tough on our girls.

I am a very compassionate and sensitive person,

and sometimes when things don't go their way

I want to coddle them,

but I find that I rarely do.

I have realized that

I want our kids to be sensitive and strong,

but mostly grateful!

I want them to understand that

in this life,

things don't always go our way.

Life can be hard,

but the worst thing we can do is

complain

and feel sorry for ourselves.

The amount of happiness

we have in our life,

truly depends on

our

attitude.

I am hoping to raise them to

be the type of people

that can and will

find the good

in every situation.

I want them to choose happiness...

Life isn’t always perfect,

But it can be great,

in spite of

the imperfections.

People aren't always perfect,

but our relationships

can be wonderful

in spite of

the flaws.

We are human.

Living active,

busy lives,

connecting with other people

for one reason or another

on a daily basis, and

those connections

can be beautiful...

if we allow them to be,

and if we

choose to enjoy what's good.

We can’t enjoy each other,

if we criticize everything

the people in our lives do.

We can’t enjoy this life,

if we focus on

unfulfilled expectations.

We are all made differently,

with different opinions,

and interests,

but

what's great is that we can be happy

if we learn to

appreciate the differences

and rather than trying to change them,

we focus on changing

our perspective. 

Not everyone is going to see things

the way that I do.

No one person

is ever going to live up to my expectations,

because those expectations,

are mine.

My expectations,

belong to me.

The only one

that will ever live up to

your standards

is you.

We have to realize that

we are not always going to live up to other

people's expectations,

and they will not always meet ours,

and that is okay!

If people are not

complaining about us,

to us,

it is not

because we are perfect.

More than likely

it is just because

they

have learned to love us

just the way we are.

A lot can be said for people who

have learned to not let

their "unmet expectations"

resonate with them,

ruin their day

or affect their attitude towards others.

Truly loving others is accepting them

for the good things

that they bring to

our lives.

No one is perfect,

and life

is not always

the perfect party.

The other day,

I found myself saying these words...

Sometimes

that piñata

is going to get broken

before we have a chance to hit it.

It is unfortunate, but

what we focus on (after) is up to us.

We can cry about how unfair it is,

you know,

poor me...

Oh, we stood in that line for so long!

Oh we thought we would have a chance to hit it!

Oh that was our one chance at fun for the day!

Or we can choose to be grateful,

you know,

lucky me...

I am so happy I was invited!

I am glad I got to stand in line next to people that I love!

How nice it was to see the look of excitement

on the face

of (the person) that got to break it.

I am choosing to be happy

for them,

and for me!

There is always a bright side...

(so enjoy the candy that you get afterwards,)

be thankful for the

sweetness

that is still left in your day.

Don't be so busy complaining about all of the things

that didn’t happen

exactly the way you had hoped,

that you are neglecting

to appreciate all of the good things

that surround you.

Choose to enjoy and share the joy

of the people that are there with you.

We can choose happiness

and gratitude.

How we see life,

and others around us

is up to us.

We create our own perspective.

How we live it,

and how we treat the people involved,

is all up to us.

Life is messy,

and complicated,

but

we have the option to make the

complicated situations

even more complicated

or

we have the option to

pick our battles and

find the good in each situation.

Life happens.

The

beautiful

part about it

is that

we have the option

to

love it.

Today friends,

let us choose

the scenic view,

the one filled with beauty.

It is certain,

 there will be a few distractions

that do not meet "our standards" along the way,

but if we keep a healthy perspective

we will most certainly see

lots of beauty along the way as well!

There is

always 

something to be happy about.