I Think of You Every Minute of Every Day

The other day, as we were riding in the car, I told my stepdaughter that every time I see a Petsmart, I think of her.

My stepdaughter laughed and repeated what I said to her sister, “Did you hear that Jocelyn? Every time mom sees a Petsmart she thinks of me.”

And Jocelyn, our other daughter said, "Well, that's okay, because 

she thinks of me every minute of every day.”

I could not help but laugh.









My kids, who know how much I love them,

are still constantly seeking love, attention and approval.

Not just from each other, not just from their friends, but from us - their parents.

I thought of the kids that do not have that.

 

Each day as I pick up my girls from school, I see a half a dozen children get picked up for a local group home. I can see them standing in line with each other joking, laughing, smiling and waiting.

And I wonder…

Are they smiling on the inside?
 

They are not waiting for a parent to pick them up like most children.

They are not going to jump in their family car.

They are not going home to do homework with siblings.

They are not going home to eat a snack that was prepared by a parent whose day revolved around picking that child up from school and getting them home safely.

They are waiting for a group leader, someone who is paid to pick them up, take them to their group home and who leaves when their shift is up.

Yet, there they stand, in front of the school, smiling.
 

They are so precious.

Do they know that?
 

Do they have anyone that tells them that they are?

Does anyone tell them that they matter?
  

That they have a purpose.

That they are loved.

That someone is thinking of them.

The other day, I read an article about this little boy he never even had a chance.

All he needed was someone to intercede on his behalf?

What was this mother thinking?

Where was this little boy's family?

Was there not a community around that saw the signs?

At his tender age, did he ever feel special or loved?

My heart hurts for these kids, 

but the sad truth is that their little hearts

hurt more.
 
I wonder what difference really could be made if…

if we did not just pause to think of them, or pray when we passed them by, but what if we actually did something?

Instead of running to the store, to spend our extra money on another pair of shoes to add to our collection, what if we got online and chose to sponsor a child? (All God's Children)

What if we cooked dinner for one month straight (instead of spending money on restaurants) and used the extra money to donate to a cause? (Children without a Voice)

Or rather than driving our kids to the mall to spend their allowance on another shirt or a video game, what if we encouraged them to donate their money to a local church or charity? (Simply Love) 

 





















My kids worry about chores, homework, and bedtime. From time to time, I see them worrying about bigger issues, like their grandma’s Alzheimers and wanting to help those in need.

But I wonder if they really understand how fortunate they are to have been born to parents who love and would do anything for them and a country that carries out laws to protect them and our freedom?

Tonight I will tuck my children into bed, say a prayer and we will kiss each other good night.

But tonight my thoughts are a million miles away.

Tonight, my thoughts are with those children that are going to bed alone and hungry, hoping they will survive another day.

Tonight, I am thinking about the children that will never get to have a parent tell them, 

"I think of you every minute of every day."

Proud Mommy Moments: Poems by Jocelyn

Last week, Jocelyn left her journal in my bedroom

and I got to peek through a few poems she was writing.

They were acrostic poems and they were beautiful!

If there was an N in mother,

she might have called me Nosey.

Luckily, there is not!

I did tell her that I saw her poems

and she proudly read them to me.

Then today,

I told her about

 

and she gave me her permission to post them!

I have always had a love for poetry.

I like when a writer is genuine

and uses thought provoking ideas.

I’m so thrilled that Jocelyn is like me,

in the sense that she always had a pen and a piece of paper on hand.

Jocelyn’s poems are definitely genuine.

These words come from her innocent little eight-year-old heart.

I was moved by the traits she chose to focus on.

Now, I want to search through her old schoolwork files

for other Mother poems to compare the difference.

What a treat my child is!

I am a proud MOTHER

and I’m sure she makes Jesus smile too!

 ***************************

My Mom is nice.

Oh, she sings pretty.

The Mom believes and has faith.

Her life was through a rainbow.

Every day I am gone, she calls me.

Right, is what she chooses.

Faith in me.

A wise guy.

The greatest man.

He is a believer.

Even a sport’s person.

Raised me very happily.

Precious Moments Before Bedtime

It's very rare for my family to need a sitter. 

I usually schedule my appointments and errands when the kids are at school. 

However on Monday evening, my husband and I had an orientation that we couldn't miss.

My oldest stepdaughter stopped by to watch her two younger sisters for a few hours.

The appointment ran a little longer than expected.

Afterwards, my husband went home to tuck the kids in for bed and I ran to the grocery store for a few items.

When I got home I found this note on the kitchen counter from Trinity:

and this note on my pillow from Jocelyn.

It was so sweet.

This was probably the first night in over a year that I haven't been home for our bedtime routine.

On school nights I always set a few minutes aside to go into our girls' rooms and read, talk and say a prayer together.

Just a few precious moments spent together before bed means so much to a child.

&&& yes, this Mommy enjoys it too. :)

Happy Parenting.

"Let's Pray, Mommy"

This weekend we went to the pumpkin patch

and enjoyed a nice day out with the family.

Yesterday, I decided to light some candles to put inside of the girls' pumpkins for them,

but clumsy me...I burned my finger on the hot jar.

It hurt pretty bad! 

I applied ice to it and when Jocelyn walked in the kitchen

and saw me shaking my finger, she grabbed my hand and said,

"Let's say a prayer, Mommy."

It was so sweet.

You see, being away from Jocelyn for a few weekends out of the month,

(when she is at her dad's house) has always been very hard.

Very, very hard.

But it's especially difficult,

when she calls me about a problem

and I am not right next to her to give her a hug.

Sometimes she calls just to talk, but most times it is because she

is nervous about something and needs some advice.

Because I am not with her,

the best I can do is give her a little encouragement

and sometimes we'll end a phone call with a prayer

about whatever the specific issue that is bothering her is.

A few weeks ago, she called me about something

she was having a little anxiety over and before I could offer to pray,

she asked me to say pray with her.

It was the first time she had called me to ask me to pray with her.

It was such a special moment.

And now, yesterday, she surprised me by saying a prayer for me. 

She held my hand, called on God and asked him to heal my finger!

It was a sweet, sweet moment, by a sweet, sweet girl.

Once again, I'm a proud, proud mama! :o)

Children are like Kites

Happy Friday! Here are a few snapshots from our week.

Jocelyn had her first ice skating lesson.

I was so proud!

I love to see my shy little girl coming out of her shell.

& then, because we didn't have the kids over the weekend

we decided to save our decorations

and have a late Independence Day celebration!

We enjoyed a 5th of July Party. :)

Fun and silly moments at home with each other are the best.

& by the giggles and grins, we know that they loved it too!

I don't recommend Dollar Tree Kites, (hehe)

but we still had tons of fun trying to get them in the air.

These are the moments that our kids will remember

and hopefully take advantage of when they become parents!

What a blessing to be able to love them!

***************************************************

Children Are Like Kites

Author: Erma Bombeck

You spend a lifetime trying to get them off the ground.

You run with them until you're both breathless.

They crash. They hit the rooftop.

You patch and comfort, adjust and teach them.

Finally they are airborne...

They need more string and you keep letting it out.

But with each twist of the ball of twine,

there is a sadness that goes with joy.

The kite becomes more distant,

and you know it won't be long

before that beautiful creature will snap the lifeline that binds you two together

and will soar as it is meant to soar, free and alone.

Only then do you know that you did your job.

Little Moments & Father's Day

I am back

and so happy about it.

I have been missing

and thinking about

my blog page lately.

I knew I wanted to write again

and,

YAY!

What better way

to come back

than to do so

with a tribute to the wonderful fathers!

And...not just the fathers,

but all of the men

who are wonderful role models to children.

Dads, stepdads, grandpas, uncles, cousins, friends,

mentors, teachers and of course the

Father of all Fathers!

There are so many children in the world in need of

a good role model / father figure and so many men step-up!

So thank you!

My husband is a great example of

how wonderful a father and stepfather can be.

He has always been so involved in the lives

of his three children.

And now, although my daughter has her "daddy,"

that she loves so very much,

she also has her "other dad." 

Their relationship makes me so proud!

Yesterday, she left this note on

my husband's dresser for him to find before he

left to work.

Later that morning, he called her and told her that

he was having a great day and it was probably

because of how happy her letter had made him.

She was so excited about what he said that

she came up to tell me.

I loved the note she left him

and I loved the phone call he made.

They both made the time to take a moment out of their day

to express their love.

Don't you just love those little moments?!

My dad always made the time to show us that he cared.

In fact, I was just remembering some of our moments the other day.

More specifically, 

the red ninja suit that he bought me when I was a kid

crossed my mind!

I was so proud that my dad was teaching me

and my brothers karate!

I think I bragged about it

to my whole school.

And the fact that my suit was

a very special-vivid red

made it even better. 

I have many memories like that!

How lucky we were.

How lucky we are.

Little moments matter.

Little moments can leave a lasting impression

and make such a difference.

May we always remember that  

little moments

are

big opportunities 

that can and will

make a difference.

And may this weekend,

be filled with many moments that

show our men how much we love and appreciate them

on this

Father's Day

(and every day.)

Kids Are So Funny...sharing some mommy moments

I have been blessed to work with so many wonderful companies over the years. I have had over ten jobs since I was 15. The number is a little high, because I had to find companies that would work with my schedule when I was taking classes at ASU. I worked at the YMCA, U-Haul, taught Kindergarten and Preschool, was a receptionist for realty and construction company and worked for a temp agency and visited various other companies. I was also a substitute teacher for several other grades.

I met a lot of awesome people and learned lots of important lessons at these jobs, although, I'd have to say that of all of the titles I have held, being a Parent is my favorite!

Being a Mom can be challenging at times, but it is more fun, than anything. I adore it. Especially, the funny moments!

Today, I plan to update Jocelyn's baby book, so I went back through some of my Facebook updates to find some funny moments to write down and I thought I'd share them here too.

Jocelyn tends to be forgetful. She leaves things at school, forgets to turn off lights and rarely flushes! When I asked her why she neglects to do certain things she told me that it happens to people with curly hair. She said, "we just look in the mirror at our hair and think about how pretty we are and sometimes we forget to do things."

When we went to see a movie on New Years Eve we had the two younger girls and our teenage son. Just when the theatre got quiet for the movie to start, our Trinity loudly leaned over to yell to me, "Hey mom! These girls are asking Issac for his number!" We thought it was hilarious, but her brother wasn't very happy!

My little second grader has a tendency to always disagree with us at home. No matter what we are talking to her about, her first instinct is to always say "no" and to disagree. So we have been working with her on being a little more respectful (and honest) at home. So, yesterday when I asked her about her day, she said that her and her friend got a long just fine because she did what I said and agreed with her. I asked, "Oh really, what kinds of things did you agree about?"
"Well, when she said, 'Wouldn't it be cool if we told on Dan and got him in trouble,' even though I didn't want to, I said yes and agreed."
Oh.Em.Gee. Obviously, we had to have another talk...!

Once when we were playing Yahtzee, Trinity asked if she should roll the dice for me. She said I might not win, because she "was the lucky charm."

Jocelyn already had cereal one morning, but decided she wanted some hot food too. So I fried her an egg. Then she asked for a thermometer. She asked me to stay away while she took her temperature. Luckily, I realized that she was planning on using the "hot food" to make her temperature rise! It was Meet the Teacher night and she was nervous and trying to get out of going!

A while back, Trinity kept finding her books and other trinkets on the floor in her room. She would clean her room and then the next day, she would find the same stuff back down on her floor. She was getting really scared, thinking that a ghost was moving stuff in her room. After a few days of this happening, I pulled Jocelyn aside to get the scoop. I found out that Jocelyn was moving stuff around in her sister's bedroom. Trinity keeps a clean room, so Jocelyn thought she would give her something to do, while she cleaned the messes in her bedroom. She didn't want her sister to start playing without her! lol

"Motherhood is about raising -and celebrating- the child you have, not the child you thought you would have. It's about understanding that he is exactly the person he is supposed to be. And, if you're lucky, he just might be the teacher, who turns you into the person you are supposed to be."

~The Water Giver 

Even Without Sugar My Cheerios Are SWEET!

As my daughter poured her bowl of Cheerios, I watched her load up on the sugar.

“Mmmm,” she said. “I love when the milk is all good and you can scrape sugar off the bottom of the bowl.” I smiled, because I knew exactly what she was talking about.

Although, I have not eaten my Cheerios with sugar in years, I used to use too much sugar, because I thought it needed it. Children need everything to taste, “yummy” and if it does not, they want nothing to do with it.

When we serve our girls their dinner, we always place a small portion of vegetables on their plates. They usually smother the veggies in ranch. They claim to "hate" vegetables, but they have had to find a way to season them to their liking.

Sugar, ketchup, ranch…plain food sweetened up with “the good stuff.”

As adults, we realize that not everything that we eat necessarily has to taste good; it just has to get the job done. It has to give us fuel for the day and include beneficial nutrients that our bodies require.

We also realize that not everything that we do in life is going to be enjoyable, but we do it because it is necessary for some reason for another and we make the best of it. Some days life and the tasks at hand can seem plain, but we find ways to sweeten the experience.

Cleaning toilets and doing laundry are my least favorite things to do, but they have to be done, so when I clean the house, I make it enjoyable by listening to music.

When I exercise (which yes, I admit I don’t really enjoy) I choose to do something I like, ride my bike, take our dog for a walk so that I can enjoy the outdoors or I’ll put on music in the living room and dance with the kiddos.

Our kids often ask my husband if he “likes his job.” Even on the stressful days, he always answers, “yes” and he explains that without it we would not be able to live in our house, drive our cars or have food on the table.

Part of growing up, is learning to be grateful for the things that aren't always seasoned to our liking.

We smile when we do not feel up to it, we laugh at our mistakes, we work to support our family, we learn from our failures, we exercise and eat well for our health, we forgive when it's difficult, we show up when we don't feel like it, we sacrifice for our children and spouses, we focus on the good even when it's hard to find and we remember that...

 Life is only as sweet as we make it.

 *************************************************

Philippians 4:11-12
I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.

Ecclesiastes 7:14
When times are good, be happy; but when times are bad, consider: God has made the one as well as the other.

Encouraging Positive Thinking and Gratitude at Home

One of the things that I am constantly trying to teach our children is to be grateful. Thankfulness and positivity has become an important message in our house.

What I do not want is…

For our children to be influenced by people who look at things in a negative light.

For our children to feel entitled or superior.

For our children to focus on the things that do not really matter in life.

What I do want is…

For our children to focus on the good, even when their circumstances seem tough.

For our children to feel fortunate to have all that they do and to realize that they have everything that they need.

For our children to focus on loving God, loving themselves and loving others.

We all get bummed out or frustrated about things, but we have the choice to let things go and focus on the positive. It is easy to get down about things. I know I have been there, but I try hard to keep the negative thoughts away. I want our children to be aware and fight the negativity as well.

Negativity can affect our physical and mental health. When we feel sorry for ourselves, we get depressed easily. When we think the world owes us something, we are often unhappy with the outcome.

I have been pushing the happy thoughts on my children more then ever these past few weeks. I am making an effort to remember to use every opportunity available as a teaching moment to find a positive for them to focus on.

Last week, the girls and I started positive talk again. When I pick them up from school, they have to tell me one positive thing from their day. It has been nice, because I already see and feel a difference in our drive home.

Before when they would get in the car and talk about their day, there were many times when they would focus on things like arguments with friends, a headache they had, how hard math was or when a friend did not play with them at recess. The nurturing side of me always coddled them and tried to solve the problems with them, but I have noticed that it only leads them to continue to come home with new problems and feel sorry for themselves about things.

I want them to have enough faith & strength to deal with the challenges of the day, but at the end of the day feel grateful for what is good. Now that we have been talking about the positive things, I think it is really making them look for the good. Some days they even name more than one positive thing, which is just fabulous!

Here is the most recent prayer that I posted on our fridge for them to read aloud at mealtime:

Dear Lord,

Thank you for a wonderful day full of blessings.
The bible says: Give thanks in all circumstances. That means you want us to be happy and thankful even when things do not always go as planned.  

Even when my day is not perfect, I know that you have blessed me.

A grateful heart is so important. When I hear others complaining or feeling bad about things, please help me to focus on the positive.

Amen.

When I look at this picture of our daughters and nieces my heart is flooded with gratitude...

Raising Honest Children

From the moment I found out I was pregnant with my little Jocelyn, I focused all of my energy on her and her well-being. It started with me eating the right foods, drinking the right drinks, and taking the proper vitamins so that she would be healthy and strong when she was born.

Then after she was born, I added many other things to my list of things I must do to keep her healthy and safe. She was so special, so beautiful, such a gift! I wanted to do everything in my power to raise her right. Her future was in my hands. I was so blessed, so fortunate and so... scared!

Jocelyn skating with elbow & knee pads...

Now my little girl is seven and I am a stepparent to three other wonderful children! My list of how to parent ((effectively)) in order to keep all four of our children healthy, happy and safe has grown even more!

There are so many things that we are trying to teach our children. With a blended family, we do not have total control over what the children see, hear and do when they are in the other parents' homes, but we hope that our persistence will pay off. We are focused on teaching them the best we can when they are in our care, praying when they are away and hopefully, our influence and prayers will be enough to help guide them.

We thought it looked like the cacti were hugging... :)

When I had my little girl, I was focused on keeping her physically healthy and safe. It never occurred to me just how much effort it was going to take to raise her up so that her mind was just as healthy! It takes a lot of dedication to raise a healthy minded child, one that has self-esteem, courage, faith, a positive outlook, and... integrity. 

Integrity is one of the many things that my husband and I are working on with our children at the moment. I have mentioned in the past that our children (like most children) have dabbled in telling lies and we take this behavior very seriously. The little white lies make it easier to start telling larger lies. Lies can put our children in danger of losing our trust, and it can put them at risk for many other hurtful things in their lives. Lies make it easier for our children to partake in habits that we want them to stay away from. 

Adulterers, cheaters, thieves, & other types of criminals all tell lies... We are making it very clear how unhealthy it is to lie. They know that dishonest people do not make great spouses, parents, friends or role models. We want them to have a great respect for themselves and for others so that they will have healthy relationships. We also want them to learn how important it is for them to keep honest friends and find a trustworthy person to marry so that they can have the best life and afterlife possible! 

Our newest family prayer (that has been posted on the fridge)…

Dear Lord,

Please help me to be honest and true.

I always want to tell the truth, even when I am afraid to.

Others might not know when I tell a lie, but you see everything. I do not want to let you or my family down.

Since honesty is important to you, help it be important to me too.

In Jesus’ name, I pray.

Amen.

A false witness will not go unpunished, and he who speaks lies will not escape. ~Proverbs 19-5

Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much.~Luke 16:10

I strive always to keep my conscience clear before God and man.~Acts 24:16

Trusting God's Plan

In the past, I have written about how God’s plans for me have been different from my own plans. I have mentioned how many of my prayers went unanswered, at least, in the way that I had hoped they would be. Only to find out, that His will for me, was even better than I could have ever imagined!

For I know the plans I have for you...plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. (Jeremiah 29:11).

At this time in my life, I know the joys of parenthood and the paralyzing love that a parent feels for his/her child. I know the beauty of a healthy, happy marriage and what it feels like to be loved and cherished. I also know Christ’s love and that I am a child of God who had not been forgotten, for even a second.

Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you; (Jeremiah 1:5)

Although, in spite of the current contentment that I feel, a long, happy, healthy life is something that I continue to pray about, because of course, I want to be around to enjoy this wonderful marriage and continue to raise our children and see them grow. I pray for other things too. I pray for the things that I feel I need and my family needs. Although, because of my experiences I now end these prayers with, “If it is your will for me, Lord”.

He went on a little farther and bowed with his face to the ground, praying, “My Father! If it is possible, let this cup of suffering be taken away from me. Yet I want your will to be done, not mine. (Matthew 26:39)

I have learned that I must trust Him and that even if my heart’s desires are not answered in the way that I wish, things will be okay. He has shown me that! After my miscarriages, I warmed up to the idea that maybe more babies are not part of His plan, then again, maybe they are! In a different way or on a time scale much different from my own...

Then Jesus told his disciples a parable to show them that they should always pray and not give up. (Luke 18:1)

I have discussed foster parenting and adoption with my husband. I also have many other ideas that I wonder about aside from having children. I am working on ideas and researching things at home, because you see, what I am really interested in is my purpose. I feel it in my heart, there is something that I should be doing.

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will. (Romans 8:26-27)

While I love being a homemaker, I do feel like I should be doing something more, but again, I wonder what that might be…

"Your beginnings will seem humble, so prosperous will your future be" (Job 8:7).

I have always had a heart for children. When I was in college studying Education, I worked in settings with children. Afterwards, I taught for a short amount of time. Then I focused on raising my baby. Now with remarriage, my focus is on our home and raising our children. Once a week, I drive out to help care for my Grandma. I also hook up to my computer daily, taking notes and submitting story ideas. Fortunately, my husband is supporting my passion for writing, but what if this is another prayer, another dream that does not work out?

For the ways of man are before the eyes of the LORD, and He ponders all his paths. (Proverbs 5:21)

I am not worried about what comes next. I am a little excited! I do not know where I will be tomorrow or what I will be doing...

Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. (Jeremiah 29:12-13)

I do know that I have learned to listen to Him. In the past, my focus, my steps, were all about my will and my desires. That has changed. I have learned that if I listen closely and follow the path that God has designed for me, my journey will be wonderful. God's plan will be enough. God's plan will give me peace and eventually, it will lead me home.

Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul (Psalm 143:8).

Letters to My Children

One of the greatest inventions ever...the camera! We get to capture moments that may never happen again. Moments that make us gasp, laugh, cry, pray and sometimes scream. The camera allows us to preserve our memories. We may forget, but photos never do. They are a reminder of what was.
Although, if I had to choose between my camera and my pen, I would gladly choose my pen! Images are beautiful, but words are what speak to my soul. The written word has made me fall in love, brought me to tears, caused me to laugh, helped me understand, has given me perspective, stimulated my mind, provoked anger, encouraged sympathy, developed passion, inspired motivation, taught me so much and yes, this long list goes on!
I love scrapbooking. I take pictures daily and save them for my children, but I also write them letters. Some of the letters, I have already given to them. Others, I save, because they are to be read by them, when they are much older. There is no standard form. I just write whatever I am feeling at the moment. Some of their letters were written during times that our family experienced change or on their birthdays describing the things that they currently love, say and do.
I plan to be around long enough to help plan the kid’s weddings, to cuddle with grandbabies even great grandbabies, I hope! However, just in case God has other plans for me, my words will always be there to remind them of my love.
I will post some of the letters to my children on occasion. Here are bits and pieces of the very first letter I wrote to Jocelyn 7 years ago, when I was still pregnant with her.

5/2003

Dear Jocelyn,

Oh, how I want to teach you so many things.

…………I want to teach you that it is important to create a relationship with God and keep it……Always remember that you have a family that adores you and a God that will never turn his back on you………..Remember to pray about everything. I know we have a tendency to pray only when things go wrong, but remember to pray and thank God for the good in your life too. Keep a bible next to your bed, on the kitchen table or even in the bathroom. Keep it someplace that you will see it every day to remind yourself what you should aspire to be……..Try to make friends that have the same values as you.....choose wisely......Do not judge people for their mistakes, love them, help them and learn from them……..Be an honest and kind person. Always think before you speak. Speak your opinion when necessary, but always do it with kindness…….I wish so much for you! Every night when I feel you kicking before I fall asleep I am so happy and yet so afraid. Will you adore me as much as I adore my mother? Will I be able to protect you from the world and still give you just enough freedom to find your true self? Will you get to experience a strong loving relationship by watching your parents as I did growing up?.........I simply adore you and so far all I have to hold is a blurry black and white picture that I hang on the fridge. I love you so much and all you can do it toss and turn in my belly, eat my left overs and hiccup occasionally. I cannot even imagine how much I will love you the moment you are placed into my arms.

Until Then,
Mommy