I did not know this kind of happiness was possible, but it is.
I find myself feeling overwhelmed with gratitude.
Although, some days I must admit, I am overwhelmed with fear.
I am not used to all of this happiness.
I wonder, will it last forever?
Will it end?
I get scared that this feeling, this life is too good to be true...
and that someday my world might come crashing down.
Isn’t that crazy?
I have all of this happiness and yet, my mind has a tendency to focus on fear…on the what if…
Anxiety has always been a bit of a problem, but I usually keep it under control. I try to manage it with positive thinking and prayer and I am trying to teach my daughter to do the same, because she has tendency to have anxiety.
I am not afraid that anything will happen to my marriage, my fear is of the unknown...accidents, illness, other unpreventable situations…life can be unpredictable and that scares me...
I just want to be here in this house, in this marriage, with our kids…always J
However, as much as I would like to stay in a little bubble forever, I know we cannot, life just keeps on happening.
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Isaiah 41:10
