Our Wonderful Men

Yesterday, I watched another Dr. Phil episode, (yes, againJ!) The last one I caught had a woman on it who was so fearful that she was going to be attacked in her own home that her family had spent over $16,000 on home security. The thing that caught my attention though, was not the fact that she had an out of control phobia, it was her husband.

How he loved her! When he was asked questions about his wife, he told Dr. Phil that he felt like a failure, because he could not make his wife feel protected. He actually had to pause, because he got tears over the fact that he felt like he was not doing his job. He wanted to protect his wife and make her feel safe, but nothing he had done had been successful.

He was doing all he could for her. Her phobia was out of his control and yet, he felt like he was at fault.

It was such a sweet thing. It made me think of my husband, and the men in my life, who care so much about their families.

So many men go through such lengths to love, protect and provide for their families.

They endure so much stress. Especially during times like this, when so many companies have been forced to close their doors or have had to layoff employees. Times are tough.  Luckily, our men are too, but this husband was a reminder that sometimes they are not as tough, as they let on.

Men take it hard when they are not able to provide everything they would like to for their families. 

It is so important for us wives and mothers, to not only be supportive during the difficult times, but also to be appreciative and remember, that our men always provide us with the most important thing they can - love.

A tender moment between my brother & his daughter

(1 Timothy 5:8, 1 Peter 3:1-7)

Just another day to be thankful...

Happy Friday friends!  

Routine Affection

Each morning before my husband leaves to work, he kisses me on the cheek. Even though it is the sweetest thing ever, this has been something that I have had to get used to. I am not a morning person and he would gladly vouch for that! I have trouble falling asleep and my best sleep, my deepest sleep, usually happens in the early morning hours between 2-6 am. When he kisses me, I usually have another hour or so that I can sleep before I have to get up with the kids, but most often than not, that kiss usually wakes me up. I cannot fall back asleep, so I lay in bed alone, (because he has already rushed out the door for the day,) thinking about sending him a grumpy text how nice one more hour of sleep would have been.

He does know it wakes me up, so he kisses me gently, but I still wake up. He of course, would stop it all together if I wanted, but I really don't! All of the kisses, the hugs, and the routine affection help to keep us passionate. It is something that I do not want us to take for granted. We kiss and hug each other hello and good-bye. We say, "I love you" almost every time we end a phone conversation and we text each other sexy "I love you" and "I'm thinking about you texts" several times a day. 

It is so easy to let important habits die.  When we first meet someone and begin dating, that person is constantly on our mind. We call each other often, send frequent emails, texts, and work hard to find time to spend together. When my husband and I first started dating, we would willingly sacrifice sleep. We never wanted our dates to end. We would stay together until we could barely keep our eyes open. That left us few hours for sleep, lots of driving back and forth between each other’s homes, but we did it nearly every day that we did not have our kids possible. Sleep was not as important as our time together and the crazy thing is that we did not even suffer the next day! We did not need sleep, we were living on love.

Things change. We get married. We have kids. Life happens. We get comfortable in our relationships and that person that once intrigued us so much becomes a part of our life. We learn each other’s interests, routines, habits, thoughts, and moods. He keeps better track of my monthly cycle than I do. We become familiar. It is not that we do not feel as passionate about each other as we once did or that we appreciate them any less, we just do not make the time to show it as often. We get caught up in the day-to-day stuff. So my husband and I make a conscious effort to schedule sex keep up the little habits of affection and to appreciate the little moments of opportunity.  

For instance, I am not a girl who likes to sit in front of the television and flip through channels, but my husband does this to relax. So sometimes, I will go and cuddle with him on the couch, and watch the boring science and history channels with him, because I know he likes it. He needs it. I need it. We make it a point to not only give each other affection, but to receive the affection lovingly. That early morning kiss may cut into my sleep some days, but it sure is a nice way to wake up.

"Thou shalt never have to wash laundry again."

I remember years ago, when my dad was telling family members about an incident that happened once when he tried to help my mom do laundry. By mistake, he used cat litter instead of laundry detergent! The point of that story was to share laughs and it worked. Everyone laughed including me, except I’m embarrassed to say that I added my own unnecessary sarcasm. I stated that it would have never happened if he helped mom around the house more often. Ouch! I know, I should have been slapped. My grandpa did give me a surprised look and for a moment I thought, did I cross a line? However, my conclusion was that he just did not know that my dad and I could tease each other like that.

Nearly a decade later, I remember that comment and I feel bad about it! I am now married to a man that is similar to my dad in so many ways. One of the similarities is that he is such a hard working man. Sometimes, I tell him how nice it is to have a husband to do all of the “manly” chores. I could learn to fire up the grill, or fix a running toilet, but I probably never will. The fact is that my husband does such a great job and it feels nice to let him take care of me. He does things for me that I do not really like or care to do and I do the same for him. For instance, the housework is my job. He works so hard outside of our home that I rarely ask him to lift a finger inside. Sure, he can take care of the plumbing or hang up frames, but when it comes to cleaning and laundry he would rather not. That is okay with me. I enjoy doing it – for him! I respect and love my husband so much that I’d rather him never have to lift the laundry detergent again and my guess is that my mom felt the same way.

This post is linked to Marriage Mondays

Agree to Disagree

My husband and I had a disagreement a few months into our marriage. So minor in fact, that I do not even remember what it was about. I do remember that I stayed in another room for about 20 minutes. I chose to be angry and to stay hurt. It is true. I was fully aware that I made the choice to stay mad. Our emotions do not control us, we control them. Staying angry is a choice that we make. After 20 minutes of thinking, I began emptying the dishwasher. As he passed through the kitchen, we both looked up at each other. I knew that we were both being stubborn, so I smiled. He smiled back, walked over, and hugged me. We apologized and agreed that we should not let our stubbornness get in the way next time.

Any relationship is bound to have arguments. They can be unavoidable at times. Finances, stress, lack of sleep, children, and so many other issues can affect our dispositions. However, minor disagreements can often create future problems in the relationship, because one person chooses to harbor negative feelings. I have seen couples argue about what to do on a Friday night and then ignore each other for days. It is crazy, but it happens. Holding on to anger only results in unnecessary pain, and anger is bad for the body! Speak your mind, then agree to disagree. Life is easier when we allow little disagreements to blow over.

"I Can't Imagine My Life without You"

Close your eyes and think about your life and your day-to-day routines. Think of all the things your spouse helps you with and does for your family and in your household. Think of all the times you have had a horrible day and your spouse was there to comfort you and cheer you up.


A few weeks ago when I was sick, my husband, was actually excited to take care of me. He left work early, ran to the store to buy some vegetables and made me homemade soup. Even if it had not tasted amazing, I would have still been so grateful that he wanted to make me feel better.


Can you imagine how different it would be if your husband wasn't in your life? I can’t either! In fact, my eyes tear up just at the thought, so I tell him! I tell him that he means so much to me and not only is he in my world, but he is my world.


Happy Sunday friends. Have a wonderful day!

Make a Conscious effort to Appreciate Him

Oh yes, ladies! We have all been there. At one point in time when our husband offers to help us with something, but the minute he does, we want him to do it differently. Maybe he did not strain the grease from the meat before adding the pasta sauce, or maybe he is not folding the towels exactly the way you want him to, but don't complain. I repeat do not complain. This is a tough one. We women tend to have a method  to our madness. We do things a certain way and we begin to think that our way is the best way. The truth is that our way is not better, it is just different.

I've seen many women criticize their men when they are trying to help, instead of just appreciating the fact that he is helping. Watching others has made me aware of this issue. Each day, I make a conscious effort to appreciate my husband for his efforts. We all should. Instead of focusing on how your man is doing it, focus on why he is doing it. Our men pitch in and help, because they love us!

So tomorrow when your husband sits down next to you on the sofa all stinky and dirty after a hard day of work, you could nag at him to go take a shower, or you could grin and bear it. At least, he is not the man that showers the minute he gets home to wash off the smell of his mistress. He might be a stinky dirty man, but he is your stinky dirty man! Aren’t you lucky?